Chemo's done

Just finished the chemo today and then start radiation on Tuesday. Thankfully I have energy through this and rode 30 mins on the stationary bike. I'm going to have the physical therapists work with me everyday so that I have extra motivation to get back into shape. Pretty wiped now so I'm signing off.

The new norm

Now that I'm back in the hospital and have had about 10 hrs to get acclimated a lot of my feelings from my last hospital stay are coming back. The big feeling is helplessness. And what I mean by that is I'm a control freak. I want to be in control of whatever situation I'm in. I also want to help affect family and friends in a positive way. But when I can't be home to help my wife out, that takes a lot away from me. Or if I can't be there for a friend or someone in my family it drives me nuts. I know, I always seem so even keel. Ha ha.

There hasn't been a time when I couldn't control or at least have the ability to control a situation. This is going to be the new normal for a while.

Back in the hospital

So, I'm back. I just got admitted the presbyterian st lukes (PSL) today. As much as I was a fan of porter hospital, this place has got some great amenities, such as a flat screen tv, a stationary bike, access to a gym and I can eat fruit and vegetables. it's amazing how little things like this make such a big difference. I start chemo in about 2 hrs. I'll let you know tomorrow how I feel.

It's on!

Tomorrow

It's been a while is my last blog, but tomorrow I get my catheter placed and on Saturday I get admitted. After being admitted, I start chemo. Not exactly the type of weekend I'm hoping to have.

This thing is happening. I'll be keeping up with the posts to let you know about my progress.

I'm gonna need your help

As you're all aware, I will be going back to the hospital in the next week. The big challenge is once I get released. It appears that I'm going to need close to 24/7 supervision to make sure that I take all my meds, that I don't fall and hurt myself, to cook my food and to get me to my appts, which will be three times a week. This is a lot to ask for and my wife, in laws and dad are going to help out (primary caregivers). What I'm asking for is if you are planning on being in town for some time in dec or Jan and can take over for a day here or there that will help my caregivers out tremendously. So what I ask is that if you will be in town and can help out, please reach out to me or anyone previously mentioned to let them know when you'll be here in Denver and can help out. I want to relieve my primary caregivers of as much stress as possible. So, if you can help, I really appreciate it. And if you can't, I understand.

Thank you!

Postponed

So it appears that the date of my admittance back into the hospital is being postponed by about 6 days. The rationale is that my doctor and the psychologist I met with during my work believe I have a high anxiety level (whatever would give them that idea) and they want me going in as calm and level headed as possible, which I agree with. This doesn't affect my brothers work up schedule for donating the stem cells and since the transfusion will be delayed a few days, the docs will just freeze SAMs stem cells til we're ready to use them. I'll be honest, I do have quite a bit of anxiety. I could definitely do what is needed even if I were admitted tomorrow, but I want to be in the right frame of mind.

So that is my update. I still have the same goal of being out of the hospital by thanksgiving.

Sunday

So I get admitted into PSL this Sunday and start radiation on Monday. My stress level is definitely rising, quickly. When I was taking a shower yesterday, my hair just fell out, so I bicked my head. Just little things like shaving my head down to the scalp makes this seem very real. And come Monday, it will be real.

So I have a few days of freedom and then things will be changing. Would like to say I'll be the same person on the other side, but I'm not sure. I'm not sure my drs know how I'll be when this all goes down. Everyone's different. No two patents are going to have the same experience.

Well it's been a while since I last gave an update. More to come.